Advice : It Isn’t Just Kink

There you are cheerfully wanking away to images of yourself scrubbing the bathroom floor clean with a toothbrush or locked in a cast iron chastity device or …

(If you are me the top is engaged in a close study of whether you whimper more entertainingly when hit with a single tail or a quirt.)

So you write a profile bragging about how happy you will be to clean floors or have orgasm only on February 29th (or advance research into the effect of cowhide on human flesh).

OK. We do meet to experience these sorts of things. But they only take up so much of the day. There are lots of hours to be filled with ordinary things.

My recent scanning of profiles shows that it is the top who is most likely to mention pleasure in horseback riding, baseball, jazz, entomology, theoretical physics and baking pies.

Bottoms are forever offering themselves as servants and targets. Tops look for that and a bit more.

Your own profile shouldn’t neglect to share your passions, enthusiasm and hobbies. I’ve lost count of how many kinky relationships began with a shared pleasure that had nothing to do with BDSM.

People generally meet for coffee or a meal. And it is more fun to think of spending time with someone who has more in them than the commonplace yearnings of the average submissive masochist.

Really many D/s couples have started with shared pleasure in an author or musician. Then progressed on to who is the finest maker of floggers.

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1 comment to Advice : It Isn’t Just Kink

  • What a wonderfully true snippet. It is not all about kink. Kink is a beautiful part of it, but there is so much more. I am a 24/7, live-in slave. I am also me. My Master is my Master at all times but we laugh, play, cry, heal, love, teach, learn and grow together. We LIVE.

    I do call Him Master, or “M” if the situation or company is ‘ify’. I do serve Him and am completely happy in servitude, but life is life. There are times He grabs my hair and it is fantasy inside of our reality, but there are times we sit together and watch Star Trek. :) We go to work, grocery shopping, pay bills. This is reality.

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